Excellent:

Thank you all for joining me today. I just wanted to tell you all what a great year it’s been and what a huge success I am. When people were downplaying my importance back in February, I worried about making a splash in the greatest economy on Earth, but I never had any doubt it would be big.

In spite of those who ignored me, I’ve literally grown from zero to a million cases in two months – I’ve basically gone platinum.

And people can’t get enough of me! Now Americans are cramming into state capitols, shopping malls, and public parks to lobby on my behalf! Some people are actually bringing guns to protect their right to pass me around from person to person. A literal armed militia has risen to defend me!

https://thebulwark.com/the-novel-coronavirus-praises-the-plan-to-reopen-america/