“Yes indeed, I know who you are talking about. I am cudgeling my memory to try and remember his last name, but it just won’t come. AHA!! It just did – Bob “Smith”. And yes, he was a sadistic SOB in old age as well. He never changed. I have never met another person who so enjoyed inflicting pain on other people – a true sadist. He retired from the rink many years ago (about the time I stopped skating – early 90s?) One of the most thoroughly unenjoyable people I have ever met. I’m sorry you didn’t use your garrotte. ”

I knew I didn’t dare interact with him for very long. That exchange was about as much as was wise.

And now I realize he was a short guy teaching grade schoolers, some of who were bigger than he, and understand that he had no interpersonal way of achieving respect. He had to instill fear to substitute, and while I was very afraid of him, I also did not give him what he wanted.

He definitely has a story which was worth hearing. I’d like to know it. And that wasn’t the time for me to be able to hear it. Truly my loss. Were I to run into him again I’d apologize for my brusque behavior and buy him coffee – tea – beer and try to understand him.

Wise words, PR.

Maybe he’s on the program now, wasn’t then, was no longer a sadistic bully after he gave up the bottle…?

Wanted to apologise, complete a step, make amends, perhaps…?

(PS EDIT: I admire your talking to him without violence.)